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Slynfoxy9
Starlite Member
Username: Slynfoxy9
| | Posted on Wednesday, February 28, 2007 - 05:39 am: | 
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My Dear AJ you do not know me but I know you for I have seen tortured times in my life also... We all have ...Let me make something very clear right up front... "Death is never an option" for solving life problems besides why would you want to let them win this evil game they play??? These people who have said all these nasty hurtful things are not important to what should be important to you.... Sugar You have been given some very good advice in this thread where you asked for help.... Your help is here take heed to what these wise people have told you...
Just remember even if not one other earthly human loves you GOD DOES and His is the only love you really need, the love of friends and family is one of many blessings we receive here on earth from God.... Looks like you have a lot of people here that do care....Forget those who dont and bask in the light of those who do....
Hugs and Love
Donna
Visit My Web Site~Reflections of My Heart ~http://home.earthlink.net/~donnadelongmatthews/
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Ceruleans_light
Starlite Member
Username: Ceruleans_light
| | Posted on Wednesday, February 28, 2007 - 03:11 am: |
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Dear Aj, Please don't go away... I have no sound advice for you...Besides I don't think you will believe me, I mean why should you, You don't even know me...I'm one of those selfish humans who wants to read your poetry, and perhaps an auto-biography of how you overcame the odds, and saw your dreams become reality even if by your own hand...There is a God... and that God loves you... I wish you well. |
Pamschwetz
Starlite Member
Username: Pamschwetz
| | Posted on Tuesday, January 23, 2007 - 03:33 pm: |
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Wow....thanks for sharing
http://www.postpoems.com/members/pamschwetz
http://www.myspace.com/pamschwetz
http://www.geocities.com/pamschwetz/pamschwetz.html
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Timelesspilot
Starlite Member
Username: Timelesspilot
| | Posted on Tuesday, January 23, 2007 - 09:32 am: |
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Thank you for modifying your poem Inside a Whisper.......
Your poem is posted at:
http://www.thestarlitecafe.com/poems/104/poem_83853822.html
"Once upon a time...was a master of crime ..."Born again for HIS glory" and now thats my story...The Timelsspilot, "Chaplain Ken" {alias} "Firewalker"-on CB radio Channel 13
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Smartchick
Starlite Member
Username: Smartchick
| | Posted on Tuesday, January 23, 2007 - 08:52 am: |
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Hi AJ! I am so sorry you are going through this. Believe me, I fully understand what you are going through. I felt the same way, when I was growing up. People, expecially kids, can be so mean. I know! I still deal with these kind of people, today. Just remember one thing. YOU ARE IMPORTANT! YOU CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE! Don't ever let anyone make you feel otherwise. Please, follow some of the advice given here.
SmartChick |
Timelesspilot
Starlite Member
Username: Timelesspilot
| | Posted on Saturday, January 13, 2007 - 05:21 am: |
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A teacher in New York decided to honor each of her seniors in High School by telling them the difference each of them had made. She called each student to the front of the class, one at a time. First, she told each of them how they had made a difference to her, and the class. Then she presented
each of them with a blue ribbon, imprinted with gold letters, which read, "Who I Am Makes a Difference." Afterwards, the teacher decided to do a class project, to see what kind of impact recognition would have on a Community. She gave each of the students three more blue ribbons, and instructed them to go out and spread this acknowledgment ceremony. Then they were to follow up on the results, see who honored whom, and report to the class in about a week. One of the boys in the class went to a junior executive in a nearby Company, and honored him for helping him with his career planning. He gave him a blue ribbon, and put it on his shirt. Then he gave him two extra ribbons and said, "We're doing a class project on recognition, and we'd like for you to go out, find somebody to honor, give them a blue ribbon, then give them the extra blue ribbon so they can acknowledge a third person, to keep this acknowledgment ceremony going. Then please report back to me and tell me what happened." Later that day, the junior executive went in to see his boss, who had been noted, by the way, as being kind of a grouchy fellow. He sat his boss down, and he told him that he deeply admired him for being a creative genius. The boss seemed very surprised. The junior executive asked him if he would accept the gift of the blue ribbon, and would he give him permission to put it on him. His surprised boss said, "Well, sure." The junior executive took the blue ribbon and placed it right on his boss's jacket, above his heart. As he gave him the last extra ribbon, he said, "Would you take this extra ribbon, and pass it on by honoring somebody else. The young boy who first gave me the ribbons is doing a project in school, and we want to keep this recognition ceremony going and find out how it affects people." That night, the boss came home to his 14-year-old son, and sat him down. He said, "The most incredible thing happened to me today. I was in my office, and one of the junior executives came in and told me he admired me, and gave me a blue ribbon for being a creative genius. Imagine! He thinks I am a creative genius! Then he put a blue ribbon that says, "Who I Am Makes a Difference", on my jacket above my heart. He gave me an extra ribbon and asked me to find somebody else to honor.
As I was driving home tonight, I started thinking about whom I would honor with this ribbon, and I thought about you. I want to honor you. My days are hectic and when I come home, I do not pay a lot of attention to you. Sometimes I scream at you for not getting good enough grades in school, and for your bedroom being a mess. Somehow, tonight, I just wanted to sit here and, well, just let you know that you do make a difference to me. Besides your mother, you are the most important person in my life. You're a great kid, and I love you!"
The startled boy started to sob and sob, and he could not stop crying His whole body shook. He looked up at his father and said through his tears, "Dad, earlier tonight I sat in my room and wrote a letter to you and Mom, explaining why I had took my life, and I asked you to forgive me. I was going to commit suicide tonight after you were asleep. I just did not think that you cared at all. The letter is upstairs. I don't think I need it after all."
His father walked upstairs and found a heartfelt letter full of anguish and pain. The boss went back to work a changed man. He was no longer a grouch, but made sure to let all of his employees know that they made a difference.
The junior executive helped several other young people with career planning, and never forgot to let them know that they made a difference in his life...one being the boss' son. In addition, the young boy and his classmates learned a valuable lesson, "Who you are DOES make a difference". You are under no obligation to pass this on to anyone.... not to two people, or to two hundred. As far as I am concerned, you can forget it and move on. On the other hand, if you want, you could send it to all of the people who mean something to you, or send it to the one, two, or three people who mean the most.
On the other hand, just smile and know that I think that you are important, or you would not have received this in the first place. Who you are does make a difference, and I wanted you to know that.
Isn't this a wonderful story? I'm passing the blue ribbon to you, for who YOU are does make a difference, too.
May GOD BLESS YOU. Have an awesome day, and know that someone has thought about you today!
A prayer for today: Lord, Thank you for my friends and family who really do make a difference to me. AMEN
MAY YOU HAVE LOVE THAT NEVER ENDS, AND MAY GOD SEND LOVE AGAIN AND AGAIN.
The Timelsspilot
"Chaplain Ken"
CB handel-- "Firewalker"
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Timelesspilot
Starlite Member
Username: Timelesspilot
| | Posted on Saturday, January 13, 2007 - 05:01 am: |
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Aj you are a very intelligent young man that has alot of poetential.
Through.....life's door there came a young man
Cripled from birth and could not even stand.
Tho' many did think "this one can't succeed"
With nothing to offer he barely could read.
Took hold of life's horns with tenaious attack
"Running Flat Out" and not looking back.
Goal was the "SKY" he'd once heard about
"I'm gonna make it.." "Won't sit here and doubt."
I find that you sir could make yes this jump
when you look at this small little hump.
With determination that "Oh yes I can...."
Out of the wheelchair came this crippled man.
Writing these words was his first step to make..
"Poetry hmmmm maybe I'll try...."
Now he paints Oceans Mountains and Sky.....
This post now ends with a listener clue is this little poem speaking to you ?????
Go after that dream and do not wait for the bell jump higher than high...come then and do tell... your heart is so heavy and through out this land
we the 'Starliters' would offer our hand. If we can be of service to you tell us dear friend, we will listen to you.
The Timelsspilot
"Chaplain Ken"
CB handel-- "Firewalker"
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Aj_shadows
Starlite Member
Username: Aj_shadows
| | Posted on Friday, January 12, 2007 - 10:49 pm: |
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I'm not mutch of a poems person. I however write short stories all the time. I once worte a stupid romantic song to cheer up this girl I met online who had alot of the same feelings as me. I'm 13 soon to be 14. I am home schooled. I was kicked out of the 'K12' online home school and now read random books on math,History,language,spelling,the list gose on.
Personally I think going to a public school would be utter hell. I don't think I could withstand the temptation to buy drugs or something. Infact I once told my mother that if she ever sent me to public school I would die one way or another. She seems to have felt some truth in my words as I'v yet to be sent to any school. I personally think it be nice to have meany friends and stuff but school...Too meany shootings happen in schools these days. Too meany drugs, and other things.
I'v met people at the church I go to. {I got to church more to socialize and try to 'fit' in other then learn of god. I'm a atheist who beleaves there is a higher being out there that control's our fate} and personally..I think there revolting in how they act in church. I'm one of those people who sits in the back of the church and just sits there. In the Youth group I'm in the public school people alwas sent to talk of drugs/curseing/Violence. Where people who are home schooled are never exspoced to such things.
I really don't know what else there is about me. The girl I mentioned abouve tore my heart from me as I'v mailed her over and over hopeing to get a answer. I'v mailed her sisters and even her mother. No one replies to my words. Somehow I feel as if I'v been used by this person in some sick way. |
Aspiring_angel
Starlite Member
Username: Aspiring_angel
| | Posted on Friday, January 12, 2007 - 10:18 pm: |
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Dear AJ
I so agree with the very good, sound and loving advice that you have received here.
I do understand what you have faced for when I was younger I faced the same thing. It is a horible, awful, feeling to be made to feel unworthy of being accepted and loved.
Tess, below me is so right in her advice to you. Please, if you can't talk to your Mom and Dad, find someone that you respect and talk with them about all this. They probably don't even know what you are going thru and they cannot help you unless they realize that you need help. Even if you have to slip them a note with your feelings on paper and set a time when you can talk to them face to face. That way when you actually are able to talk you don't have tho worry about starting at the very beginning, they will already know what you are feeling and will be able to give you sound advice.
The world gets crazy even for us ''Oldster's'' but let me tell you this . . . What we live makes us stronger. We can either let life defeat us or let life carry us to things that we cannot even imagine as being possible while we are so down. To end you life cheats the world of what you will one day offer us all.
You have a lot of friends here that truly care what happens to you and the feelings you are going thru. True friendship's are born and kept on Starlite and harrassment is not tollerated.
I know two of the three people that have answered this thread quite well and just beginning to know Ken, but I know that each of their words to you was written in honesty and sincerity as are mine.
Tell us a little about yourself. How old you are. Where you go to school. Is this going on in school as well? Let us get to know you a little better so we can help. Do you write on Starlite? Send me your links to my email address.
You are in my prayers.
Hugs,
Lesa
Lesa Gay Aspiring Angel
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Aj_shadows
Starlite Member
Username: Aj_shadows
| | Posted on Friday, January 12, 2007 - 09:00 pm: |
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I don't have any real life friends. My only true friend tried to kill himself and is currently in a Youth camp where he will stay at until he's 18. I am home schooled and thus there is no school person I can speak to. I can not tell my mother for she will simpley send me to a white padd'ed room or something. Infact it is my family witch is actully makeing me stressed out alot. Constantly I am defending myself when there is no one on my side. My mother think's I'm nothing but a lazy person who dose not want to do anything. Well I do wan't to do things but not 24/7. Constantly it's one job after another leaveing me even a smaller time for friendship online. I'm at the point where I simpley block out peoples voice's in hopes that they leave me alone to my 'things'. I'm not really intrested in God and other things. I beleave that there is a god/gods but there all the same basicly. Each culture has it's on respective on 'god' or gods. They have a tale where someone heals them or something else. The vary fact there is so meany leads me to think there really is none.
I just don't feel like I used too. Like even now I'm contemplating on weather or not to destory my internet life so as I may slowly wast away in my emotions.
It's not just teaseing. It's the vary way people treat me. They think I'm not as smart as them while in reality I know alot more then I let on. I was raised in a family filled with backstabbing and mean people. Hell my mother's brother was a supect in the murder of someone. {Case is still unsolved} Then there's my insain father who is like a Skitso. There my Aunt's who are all crazy one way or another. Then my sisters who litterly treat me the same way as my mother dose. They think they can boss me arround and becouse of this lame ' Boys can't defend themselfs against girls' rule in my family I am forced to take my littel sisters tackels and bites and hits. Each time more rage boils in me and I have lost it afew times. I'v been thinking heavely on reality and woundering if anything is 'real' in the sense. I see things in a pattern in life and see that there is nothing really good in life. You make friends. They move,Die,forget you. Then you have family who die/leaves you/so on. Then hell there's even people who you love who make it seem like they love you back and then suddenly they sever all contacts with you makeing you go crazy thinking about if there alive or not or if there okay or if they even truely 'liked' you.
I just don't see any real resone in liveing life. It might sound sad to some people but to me it just sounds realistic. Human's are like animal's. We ear,drink,breed,and kill one another. The only resone we feel like we are a higher race in the world is becouse we 'learnd' how to make fire and buildings and the weel. Sometimes I think maybe if humans where 'not' at the top of the food chain maybe things in life would be more...Normel. I know meany will dissagree with me. Hell I don't even know why I'm bothering typeing such a long post. I just feel like I should get out everything I think about stuff. |
Tess
Starlite Administrator
Username: Tess
| | Posted on Friday, January 12, 2007 - 07:30 pm: |
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Dear Aj,
I am so sorry to hear that you have been teased so much on the computer. That must be just horrible! I have heard of such things. I think they call it cyber bullying, or something like that.
Please know that these people who are teasing you are the ones who have problems. It is not your fault. Your life is not crap. Don't you let them make you feel that way.
Have you told your parents about this teasing? If not, I urge you to talk to them straight away. If you can't talk to them, perhaps there is an aunt or uncle or a teacher or a clergy member you can confide in. You really need to let someone close to you in real life know this is going on!
I urge you to hang in there! And again, tell Mom and Dad what is going on.
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Jmduca
Starlite Member
Username: Jmduca
| | Posted on Friday, January 12, 2007 - 07:27 pm: |
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Dear one,
I see by your profile that you are still quite young. I also read your favorite motto. (Sounds typical for a hurting teen)
Where are your parents in all of this? Surely they know how much you are hurting and what you are going through. What about your school counselor or is it that you are apprehensive to go to them as well thinking if they get involoved there will be even more confrontation for you to endure? Having grandchildren of my own I can somewhat relate to where you are coming from. Yor age is deffintely target age when kids your age are into mockery and belittling. And honey I sincerely do feel your pain which comes across strongly in this thread. But you do need counseling and guidance. And also a really good friend would be a blessing in your young life. Name calling can hurt a person no matter what the age and some really stick and last a lifetime. Society has done quite a mess on our youth of today. And for this and what you have been through I am deeply sorry. BUT I ASSURE YOU AND EVEN PROMISE YOU that there is somebody that will listen if you open up to them and let all these pains and feelings out. PLEASE sweetheart talk to an adult that you know you can trust that will help you over these hurdles and whatever you do..... DO NOT try to end it all. You are crying out for help and I pray that somebody is listening. In the meantime I am praying for you. And hope to hear from you soon. I send you supportive love and oh so many prayers. ~Jacie~
~Jacie Stralko Duca~
JMDUCA@webtv.net
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Timelesspilot
Starlite Member
Username: Timelesspilot
| | Posted on Friday, January 12, 2007 - 01:43 pm: |
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Please contact me @ timelesspilot2000@yahoo.com
The Timelsspilot
"Chaplain Ken"
CB handel-- "Firewalker"
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Aj_shadows
Starlite Member
Username: Aj_shadows
| | Posted on Friday, January 12, 2007 - 09:06 am: |
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I just can't take it anymore. I'v been teased for years on the computer. People telling me Im worthless and stuff. I won't go into detail as I tried makeing this thread but it did not get made for some resone. My life is crap and I feel that if I die maybe people would be happy. They claim that they would luagh at the thought of my death and crap. I just can't take the prassure I'm takeing. For the past year It's been like this. I don't know if I should just die to end my pain and suffering. |
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