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· 65 poems by CrimsonSkies
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 Title   [ Click any title below to view poem ]Category Date
 Protecting My Mother's Secret Mature Audience 10/24/2019
 Coming Home The Pain of Love 9/2/2019
 The Last Tick to Tock Dark Poetry 9/1/2019
 First Letter to His Mistress Misc 10/30/2018
 I am Broken Misc 3/31/2016
 Just for Tonight Misc 3/31/2016
 Convincing Dark Poetry 2/25/2016
 Junkie Song Lyrics 7/3/2014
 Anger Misc 7/3/2014
 Of Love Love 12/11/2013
 Jealousy Life 12/11/2013
 Deceit The Pain of Love 11/16/2013
 Unclear; Insincere Misc 11/5/2013
 Goodbye to My Carnal Addictions Mature Audience 10/21/2013
 Seven Numbers Misc 10/21/2013
 Anybody? Insight 10/20/2013
 Hope Grieving and Loss 10/19/2013
 I Bleed Insight 7/19/2013
 Writer, Blocked Misc 12/5/2011
 My Bayzeebee Misc 8/6/2011
 I am the Empty Page Misc 5/21/2011
 A Toast to Taps Friends 9/18/2009
 The End of Beginnings Insight 9/16/2009
 A Final Toast to Starberry Blonde Misc 11/13/2008
 Random October Musing The Pain of Love 10/16/2008
 The Way I Wish Things Used to Be Unrequited Love 4/17/2008
 A Little Girl's Prayer Life 4/11/2008
 Children of the Twilight Life 4/8/2008
 Broken Heart's Goodbye Love 4/8/2008
 Love Lost in a Picture's Thousand Words Love 4/8/2008
Pages: 1 2 3

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Protecting My Mother's Secret

The ears were flicked
The tongue was burned
Each misstep was demeaned
Each weakness mocked
How my best friend talked
With amusement eyes would gleam
Move faster, No?
A lighter flies
Swift parental attack
Next time I say
To Do something
Remember the pain on your back
What f*cking gay *ss sh*t is this
A 9 year old is asked
The beer stench overwhelming
As the child's room is passed.
Let's all laugh about murder
Of the little and the small
They're just animals
Their ours to kill
Break their legs and watch them crawl
My Grandma chews
'Too loud' so he
Says she eats like a pig.
Spik, Chink, and f*cking beaners;
There to teach me 'Not all black's are nigs'
But Mom tried to protect us
Soothed us after he flared
Just another poor trapped soul
That this angry soul ensnared
Until that anger built inside her
And it had nowhere to go
So with every month or so's passing
That anger would explode
And so our great protector
Became our biggest fear
Come with me girls
It's time to run
Maybe later we can get near
I've inherited that anger too
I put my kids thru hell
I hurt them and I shamed them
Just like I was taught so well

Life isn't what you didn't do
It's made of what you did
You didn't face your problems
You just ran away and hid
Then you left us there to take it
Like somehow we were to be blame
And yet you tell us this is normal
When in fact it's quite insane

I have tried to fight the anger
But it's a trip both long and slow
I'm racing my own strength
To make sure my top never blows

Have you ever been a chemistry test
To save your children's lives?
What mix will be the one that helps
The angry sleeping dogs lie
Up and down and side to side
I never quite felt stable
But clearly that didn't matter
When YOU felt that I was able

I've stolen and manipulated
Beaten and abused
Cheated, lied, and scared others
For most of my years through
I laughed as I broke people down
To shambles of themselves
Take that you motherf*ckers
Look at my heart's burning hell

But my daughters,
My sweet daughters
I can't do the same to them
The cycle must be broken
The anger has to end

So these long years I have fought for them
When my eyes were seeing red
As I struggled with my anger
Two people fighting in my head
If that's not effort, then I'll stop
And we'll see what I can do
When I stop bracing against the anger
Cuz with just your words I can 'just push though'
Dear God, you f*ckers would regret
The psychotic rage that I would rain
Where instead of calm mediator
I'd bring the world fire and pain

No good could ever quench the bad
No trip, or cool thing bought
I wish it did, I know you do too
But the way the world works, that is not

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