Centerfold
Huh?
She's the one who won?
YOU IN BIG TROUBLE, MISTER!
Well. I didn’t win the contest
My picture wasn’t first
In fact, the guy who took it
Weighted it the very worst
He said I ain’t no centerfold
It was very plain to see
In a bathing suit I looked a mess
With my big old boney knees
He didn’t like my evening gown
My negligee or slip
In my reclining pictures
It looked like I had huge hips
He didn’t like the beauty mark
The one above my lip
Said he could see the scar line
From where my face lift must have slipped
I was sure he’d love my big blue eyes
Such a pretty velvet blue
I can’t help the photo shows them
Like I had a drink or two
He said my hair looked orange
Instead of light bleached blond
Said I wasn’t tall and skinny
That my picture looked rotund
He criticized my breast line
Said my boobs were puny knobs
That hits below my belt line
T’was such an expensive job
I just knew that I’d score better
Maybe even best of all
But he didn’t even like my butt
Said it was no ass at all
So just keep your dirty magazine
Posing naked I won’t do
Pick some other frog for the centerfold
Playboy, I ain’t gonna buy you!!!
For the Tuning Up Challenge
Midi: Centerfold
By jollynoblefrog
© 2008 jollynoblefrog
(All rights reserved)
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