The Night I Met Leroy Brown
One night while delivering my orders of Avon
I made a wrong turn on the wrong side of town
As if that wasn't a bad enough thing to happen
I ran over this guy by the name of Leroy Brown
I had stopped my car but I wish I could have left
When I got out I was so afraid to look at him
For fear he'd be all mangled up and hurt real bad
But he jumped up and said 'What's with you, Slim?'
Hah! Slim, I thought this man had to be delusional
When I tried to call the cops he said, 'don't do that'
But I still dialed 911 because I felt he needed help
He then hollered and yelled and called me an old bat!
He jumped into my car and said 'Sista, just drive!'
'C'mon now, Big Mama, get me outta here quick!'
Hah! Well that made me mad he'd called me big!
I could have hit him over the head with a brick!
Before I could get into the car some thugs grabbed me
And wrestled this poor lost Avon lady to the ground
Sirens were blaring, Leroy stuck his head out the door
When they saw him, they scattered, nowhere to be found
I heard one of them say as they were running away
'Did you see that dude? It was Bad, Bad Leroy Brown?'
I then wondered what on earth had I gotten myself into
I got in, sped away, he just looked at me with a frown
I asked him why was he even looking at me like that
Because I had done everything he had wanted me to do
He sheepishly said, 'Excuse me, I have to pass some gas!'
I about died laughing my head off, I swear this is true
Then I dropped him off a few blocks from the scene
He said, 'Take this so you will always know where you are'
Bad, Bad Leroy Brown was a pussy cat as far as I could see
He had given me a brand new GPS system for my car
(stolen of course)
Written for the Tuning Up Challenge
Midi - Bad Bad Leroy Brown
Hostess: jean_e_ward (Jean)
By Adele Kaye
© 2010 Adele Kaye
(All rights reserved)